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Good afternoon!

Okay, so that loud whooshing sound is me letting out my breath.  I was so worried I might offend somebody with last night’s post that I actually forwarded it to my sister for a “sensitivity check” and still fretted I might hurt somebody with it.

I know.  I’m the sensitive one, so worried about upsetting everyone else.  Yep.

I appreciate you guys sharing with me the charities that are close to your heart.  I realize that you shared something with me that was very personal and intimate, and I’m touched that you comfortable enough to share that with me.  Thank you!

Anyway, thanks for the suggestions on haircare!  Surprisingly, that circa-2003 Suave is the best stuff I’ve used before, but another type of Suave made my hair fall out.  You win some, you lose some.

Perhaps I should just look at recipes for making my own shampoo?

Speaking of recipes, while I don’t have an official one for you here today — it’s stuff you’re all familiar with — I had a total win with my breakfast today.

It was so good that I actually didn’t eat it.

Peach Cobbler Breakfast MIM

I threw together a simple MIM — 3 tbs peanut flour, 1/4 tsp baking powder, cinnamon and vanilla, 1/3 cup (estimated) applesauce, and a whole egg — and microwaved it for a couple minutes.

There was a peach on the counter beckoning to me, and I couldn’t resist.  I chopped it into bite-sized pieces (it was an epic Costco peach, by the way) then threw it into the nuker for about two and a half minutes, until it was simmering in its own juices.  I added a sprinkle of cinnamon and vanilla to the peaches, then added a splash of almond milk to round out the flavor.

I layered the MIM into the bottom of my bowl, added the peach, then topped it with an almond butter sauce (almond butter + almond milk, nuked) and a handful of sliced almonds.

It tasted like dessert, seriously.

Omigosh.

Holy yum, but this stuff was good.

I ate a few bites of it, until I realized that there was no way my conscience would let me keep this to myself.  I had to let Amor try it.

He’s generally very receptive to trying new things, but mostly, he tastes my food to be polite.  So, when I offered him a bite, I acknowledged that he accepted it not because my breakfast looked good, but he wanted to spare my feelings.

It even looks delicious! Or not.

He took the bite, and that’s when a curious expression crossed his face.

“Did you like it?”

“It tastes like a cobbler!”

Great.  My breakfast tastes like shoes.  Or rather, a shoemaker.

I'll definitely be making this again.

I ate a few more bites, then asked Amor if he wanted another taste, and was completely floored when he said yes.

What?  He’s actually wanting to eat something that is Kaz-Food?

I was so thrilled that he enjoyed it, that I offered him the rest.  He demurred for a moment, but after confirming that I didn’t mind giving up my breakfast to him, he actually happily accepted it!  Say what?

Then the questions started. “There has to be sugar in this, right?”

Nope.  It was sweetened with applesauce and peach juice.  Really? Really.

“What flour did you use?  That’s peanut flour?”  Yep.  Did I use peanut butter?  Nope, that’s almond butter.

You know it’s a victory when your meat-and-potatoes guy finishes off the entire breakfast and loves it.

Have you ever made something healthful and was surprised when somebody else actually liked it?  What’s your favorite “healthy” recipe? See!  Eating well doesn’t have to be boring!

Thanks for reading!

❤ Kaz

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Evening!

Thank you, guys, for all the birthday wishes!  It made me feel really good to read all them, and made me so happy!

So, basically, 99% of my nourishment today came in the form of frosting.

For example, breakfast?  A banana, cupcake, tons of frosting.

Lunch?  Boomi bar, apple.

Dinner? Two small sushi rolls, and a seaweed salad.

And just now?  Another cupcake and seriously, like, a cup of frosting.  I’m a frosting addict, and I’m out of control.

I went out of my way to bake myself some delicious gluten-free chocolate cupcakes, just to use them as a vehicle for frosting.

I done did good.

So, my doctor’s appointment was sort of a disappointment.

I waited around for the better part of an hour to have them take down my symptoms, go, “Hm, no idea what’s going on here,” and be told they doubt it ‘s an allergy or intolerance and that they don’t want to restrict my diet any further — dude, come on.  You want me to keep eating stuff that might be making me sick to avoid restricting my diet any further?  Seriously?

I was referred to social worker who will help me get insurance, since they informed me that the tests will be very expensive, but was told to take Metamucil and, as an afterthought, was suggested to take probiotics.

Oh, and they want me to see a therapist again.  Which is fine, I’m not ashamed.  But I didn’t come in claiming to be depressed.  I came in claiming to have an upset tummy.

I have a follow up in a month to determine if the probiotics and Metamucil help, and if not, I guess they’ll start with the tests?

I give them credit — they’re trying to give me a short-term solution until I get insurance, but I guess I feel let down because I was hoping for another answer than, take fiber and probiotics.  Sigh.

Dark chocolate cupcake with vanilla coconut creme frosting.

Here, have  a recipe or two:

Rich Chocolate Gluten-Free Cupcakes:

1/4 cup gluten free flour*

1/4 cup cocoa powder

1/4 tsp salt

1/2 tsp baking soda

3 large organic eggs

1/4 c oil*

1/2 cup sugar

2 tbs full-fat coconut milk

Preheat oven to 375 F.  Sift dry ingredients together.  Mix wet ingredients.  Slowly stir dry ingredients into wet ingredients.  Bake for 20-22 minutes.  Makes 6 large cupcakes, or 9 smaller ones.

(Notes: *I used 1/3 cup of peanut flour, but heavier flours — brown rice, et cetera — can be reduced to 1/4 cup.  Lighter flours, like tapioca starch, may want to be upped to 1/3 cup.  For my oil, I used coconut oil.  For the sugar, you can sub in 1/2 cup honey, maple, or agave, and omit the coconut milk.)

Vanilla Coconut Creme Frosting:

3-4 cups powdered sugar

1/3 cup full-fat coconut milk

1 tbs coconut oil

1/4 cup coconut butter

2 tsp vanilla extract

Add ingredients in a bowl, and beat until creamy.  Add more confectioners sugar for a stiffer frosting.  To pipe onto your cakes, pour into a ziploc bag and snip off the corner.

Enjoy!  The flavor combo of vanilla coconut and rich, dark chocolate is incredible.  The cupcakes are super moist (sorry, gross word!) and tender, and not too sweet, and the frosting has a mild coconut-vanilla flavor, and has just enough sweetness to balance out the cupcakes perfectly.

What’s your favorite flavor of cake?  Do you prefer frosting or cake? I’m a frosting girl, all the way!  My favorite flavor is lemon-vanilla sponge with jam and cream, but chocolate is a close follow-up!

Thanks for reading!

❤ Kaz

Good day!

How is everyone?

Right.  Um.  I’m off to a late start, aren’t I?

I have an excuse!  Two, actually.

One: New recipe!  Yay!

Two: BSOD are the devil’s work.

You need coarse-ground corn meal for this recipe.

But yes, I have something new for you guys, and I think you’re gonna love it.

You see, as I have mentioned before, I am a Southern gal.  I was born in Tennessee, spent some time in Alabama before moving to Arkansas, where I spent most of my growing-up years.

You want to know the first thing people ask me, upon meeting me and learning that I’m from the South?

Any recipe that starts with "Layer your bowl with blueberries drizzled with honey and cinnamon" is bound to be a good one.

“If you’re from the South, where’s your accent?”

No idea.

As far as I know, I never got one, and I have no idea how that happened.

Another thing I never got?  The South’s fixation on all things corn.

Corn bread, corn pudding, creamed corn…and of course, grits.

This is my new favorite breakfast.

I have another confession for ya’ll, and it’s up there with the fact that I’ve never used “ya’ll” in context.

I’ve never made grits before in my entire life.

And I maybe have had them twice?

My first memorable experience, though, was last summer, when my uncle offered to make me grits and eggs for dinner.  For some reason, he was simply thrilled to be the one to introduce me to this culinary delight.

Blueberries, walnuts, and real maple syrup.

You see, to a Southerner, grits and eggs go together, hand-in-hand, like peanut butter and jelly.

Mmm, peanut butter and jelly…

No!  Don’t distract me.  This is important!  Yes.

So, grits and eggs, the true Southern breakfast staple…and I’ve only had it once, and I’ve never actually, truly made them before.

This breakfast may wedge quinoa porridge down from the #1 spot.

Today, that needed to change.

The first thing to know about making grits is to make sure you have the proper kind of cornmeal.  You want the coarse-ground stuff, commonly packaged in a pretentious and overpriced box that says “Polenta”.

Dude, it’s hominy grits.  Don’t pay twice the price for fancy nomenclature.

If you use cornmeal for baking, you’ll get a breakfast known as “cornmeal mush,” which is, in fact, a real breakfast.  However, we want grits.

Any excuse to pour kefir onto my breakfast is a good one.

The other thing to keep in mind are your ratios.  You want a 1:4 ratio, of grits to water.

I used 1/4 cup grits and 1 cup of water.

Now, this is real simple.  Plus, it’s also super-quick.  By the time my tea was done percolating, my grits were cooked and in my bowl.

How’s that for awesome?

I'm in love.

In your small sauce pan, combine 1/4 cup grits and 1 cup water.  Bring to a simmer over low heat, and stir until thick and water is absorbed (roughly five minutes).

Don’t let it come to a boil, though.  It’ll totally throw your texture off and make it slimy.  Gack!

Once thickened, add in 1/4 tsp vanilla and 1 tsp blackstrap molasses.  Keep stirring.

In a separate bowl, whisk together one whole egg, and 2 tbs almond milk.

Please make this soon!

Use a whole egg, by the way, and not just egg whites.  Grits tend to lend toward a more savory disposition, and the yolk adds a level of richness that makes them exceptionally creamy and delicious.

Slowly stir in your egg, taking care to ensure that it doesn’t cook.  Because it will try, I promise.  Mine did, a bit, but I didn’t let that faze me.  Southern gals don’t fret over petty details, you know.

Once thickened, remove from heat, and add up to 1/4 cup more of almond milk, or until creamy.  You don’t want this to be like custard, but rather, more like a very thick and creamy porridge.

In your serving bowl, add 1/2 cup of blueberries, a teaspoon of honey, and a dash of cinnamon.  When you add your grits, the blueberries, honey, and cinnamon will infuse an amazing flavor throughout your porridge.

Pour your grits into your bowl, then top with the other half of your blueberries and a generous drizzle of maple syrup.  Or, use more honey, but the maple syrup is amazing.  Add walnuts, or other nut of choice, and add a dollop of vegan kefir or yogurt, to taste.

Guys, this breakfast was pure bliss.  To say it may bump back my quinoa porridge as a favorite is a serious statement that doesn’t just get thrown around lightly.

Recap?  Sure!

Creamy Breakfast (Polenta) Grits:

1/4 cup coarse-ground cornmeal

1 cup water

1 tsp blackstrap molasses

1/4 tsp cinnamon

1 whole egg

1/4 cup + 2 tbs almond milk

1 cup blueberries, to taste

Cinnamon, honey, maple syrup to taste

Cook grits and water over medium heat, until thickened and water is absorbed (about five minutes).  Whisk egg and 2 tbs almond milk into the grits.  Stir until thick and creamy.  Remove from heat, and add up to 1/4 cup almond milk for texture.  Top with blueberries and cinnamon and honey, and enjoy!

Thanks for reading!

❤ Kaz

Evening, folks!

I decided not to muddle up the blogworld tonight with an inane post (I had salad, a pear, watermelon, and about 3 and a half muffins for dinner, go me!), and rather instead, I’m just going to cut to the chase.

I know why you came here tonight.

Banana Walnut Muffin

Gluten-Free Banana Walnut Muffins:

1.5 cups all-purpose gluten-free flour*

1/2 cup tapioca flour

1/4 cup raw sugar + 1 tbs for sprinkling

1 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 cup chopped walnuts

2 very large, very ripe bananas

1.5 tsp cinnamon

2 tbs. coconut oil

1 organic egg

3/4 cup minus 1 tbs almond milk

1 tbs vinegar

Preheat oven to 350.  In a mixing bowl, combine your flours (see comments below!), sugar, starch, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt.

In a separate bowl, mash your bananas, egg, oil.  Pour a tablespoon of vinegar into your measuring cup, then fill the cup 3/4 the way full.  Add soured milk to your wet mixture.

Pour your dry mixture into your wet mixture and stir until combined.  Add walnuts.

Measure into twelve muffins.  Sprinkle tops with sugar.

Bake for 15-18 minutes.  Eat.  Enjoy.

Notes:

I used a combination of 1/4 cup buckwheat flour, 1/2 cup chickpea flour, and the rest with 3/4 cup brown rice flour.  The taste was fantastic, but you can use 100% brown rice flour if you so wish, or experiment to taste.

To make a vegan version, substitute in 1 tbs milled flaxseed with 3 tablespoons hot water.  However, if you use eggs, I encourage the use of organic.

I think cornstarch would work fine in the place of the tapioca.

I used raw sugar, mostly because it’s only a dollar a pound for it at the grocery store.  Use whatever sugar you deem fit.  I don’t know how it would turn out with honey, maple, or agave, but I encourage you to experiment.  If you take out the sugar and use artificial sweeteners, I will kick you hard in the shins.

Same goes if you leave out the fat.  I will send mean thoughts in your general direction.  I used coconut oil, but I’m sure olive oil or even butter would work fine.

Um, I forgot to add vanilla.  Go for it.

One more thing!  I bake with my food scale, which means that my measurements are extremely precise.  That also means that my dry measurements are estimated!

I hope you enjoy!

However, here are my weighted measurements for bakers who prefer to cook that way:

Gluten-Free Banana Walnut Muffin Recipe:

60g chickpea flour

30g buckwheat flour

145g brown rice flour

70g tapioca flour

50g raw sugar + 10g for sprinkling

4g salt

6g baking powder

4g cinnamon

1 organic egg

56g walnuts

28g coconut oil

250g ripe bananas

3/4 cup minus 1 tbs almond milk

1 tbs vinegar

These muffins prove that good food does equal love.

Thanks for reading!

❤ Kaz

Oh, guys.

Ohhhh, guys.

I have failed you.  I have failed you seriously wrong awful bad.

You know how I’ve been all like, “Omg, try my quinoa porridge, it’s teh awesome!”

All this time, I’ve been doing it wrong.

I’m so ashamed.  Mortified.  Penitent.

How can I ever redeem myself?

Fluffy, melty drifts of yumminess.

I know.  I’ll tell you how to make it, and make it right.

Another quick apology: my pictures are rubbish today.  I don’t know what I did wrong.  Maybe in my appalled haze at my misdeeds, I forgot to turn on my  macro lens.

Or, maybe it’s just hard to take pretty pictures of amorphous beige blobs.  Who knows?

I love how the peanut butter melts over the porridge.

I only made on slight change to my recipe, but it made a world of difference.

Please heed my warning, and avoid the shame that I now suffer.

Do not cook this in the microwave!

Yes, it’s that simple.  Do not nuke, pass go, or collect two hundred dollars.

However, if you make this right, you’ll melt into a little pile of happy, not unlike the peanut butter dripping down and pooling in this warm, fluffy, delicious banana porridge.

This was so very tasty. Please make it for breakfast soon!

I made this entirely on the stove top.  Remember the basic cooking process on these?

Want a refresher course?

Sure.

In a small saucepan, bring 2 tbs dry quinoa and 1/2 cup water to a boil.  Once boiling, cover, and reduce the heat to simmer and cook for thirteen minutes.

I used a scant amount of honey, but it made the natural sweetness of the porridge shine through.

Thirteen.

You don’t have triskaidekaphobia, do you?  Psh, there’s no room for scaredy cats in the culinary world.

However, if you must, let it simmer for twelve minutes and fifty-nine seconds.  Whatever sets your mind at ease.

Once your quinoa is cooked, add in your banana and increase the heat to medium-high.  Smoosh your banana until it has melted into the quinoa, maybe a minute or two.

Add in 1/4 tsp vanilla extract, 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon, and 1 teaspoon blackstrap molasses.  Stir, then throw in 1/4 cup almond milk and 1 tbs milled flaxseed.

Despite being an ugly picture, this was my best bowl of porridge yet. Mmm!

Stir until creamy, a minute or so.

Reduce the heat back to low, and slowly stir in your eggs.  Just adding the eggs should take you the better part of a minute.  Stir another minute, until porridge resembles a delicious custard.

Increase the heat to high, stir for another thirty seconds.

Remove from heat, and pour into your bowl.  Top with 2 tbs peanut butter, honey, or toppings of your choice.

Ready for that in recipe form?

Sure ya are.

Peanut Butter Banana Quinoa Porridge:

2 tbs dry quinoa

1/2 cup water

1 whole banana

1/4 tsp vanilla extract

1 tsp blackstrap molasses

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/4 cup almond milk

1 tbs milled flaxseed

1/4 cup egg whites

2 tbs peanut butter

1-2 tsp honey, to taste

Cook quinoa, add banana.  Let it return to a boil, and stir/mash the banana until fully incorporated into porridge.  Reduce heat, and add in cinnamon, blackstrap molasses, and vanilla.  Add almond milk and flax, and stir until creamy.  Slowly add in egg whites, and stir until fluffy.  Increase heat for a half minute, stir.  Remove from heat, top with peanut butter and honey.

Indulge.

Best.  Breakfast. Ever.  Plus, you go from hungry to sated in less than twenty minutes.  Can’t beat that, right?

Right!

You love me again, don’t you?  You forgive me for my transgressions?

I knew you would.

Thanks for reading!

❤ Kaz

Good morning, everyone!

Hey, by the way, if you’ve found my blog through some way or another, don’t be shy!  Leave a comment.  You don’t have to be a blogger.  I won’t judge.  Say hello and you will make my day.

Kid you not.  You say hi, and I’ll beam from ear to ear.

Try it.  It’s cool, like a magic trick.  Hey, guys, I figured out how to make Kaz grin.  Look!  Ohhh, dude…that’s so cool!

See?

Just like magic.

Today is off to a great start.  I may have figured out my insomnia issues: sunlight streaming in through my window.  Our black-out blinds aren’t perfect, so I may fashion an eye-shade or something to help with the issue.

Finally! Sweet potato pancakes, at your service.

My appetite was still a bit off this morning (I’m sure it had absolutely nothing to do with the apricot and handful of grapes I snarfed before crawling into bed), so while I waited for my hunger to kick in, I tackled some chores.

I loaded the dishwasher, scrubbed the sink (it desperately needed it…yuck!) and started a load of laundry.

Something about being elbow-deep in sink grime really made me famished.

Say what?

Sure, all the cool kids get hungry when scraping old rice off the side of their kitchen sink, didn’t you know that?

I covered them in an almond-butter-honey glaze. Delish!

The feeling of success and accomplishment (yay!  so many chores done before I’ve had my morning tea!) and the gnawing in my gut inspired me to attempt my sweet potato pancakes one more time.

You may remember when I hinted at my last failed attempt at making these.  I was a wee bit cross that morning.  However, in the effort, I realized my mistake.

When baking gluten free goods, you need a binder to hold the batter together.  Gluten tends to do that for you, but since my body seems to hate gluten, you need to use something else.

I was so excited about my success, I failed to take a picture before pouring my "syrup" onto them. Sorry!

This recipe is great because it calls for reasonably common ingredients.  I didn’t want to use any fancy gums (by which I mean guar or xanthan, not Trident or Bubble Yum) because most people do not have access to fancy-schmancy-pants ingredients.

In this case, the egg whites act as the binder and hold the ‘cakes together.

Clever, right?

I thought so.

The neat thing about this recipe, other than how it bears a striking resemblance to pie (Homer voice: Mmm, pie!), is how much it resembles real pancakes.

Are you drooling yet? 'Cuz, I am.

That is, if real pancakes tasted like pie.

My sister taught me how to make pancakes, believe it or not.  While most of my childhood revolved around me hovering in the kitchen with my mum and assisting her in her baking adventures (my family has an epic sweet tooth), it was my sister who gave me the best advice on how to make perfect pancakes.

I never forgot it.

You know how when you pour your batter into the pan, all those lovely little bubbles crop up around the perimeter of the pancake?

Amazing. Simply amazing.

Write this down, because you don’t want to forget it.

When that bubble in the middle of your pancake pops, your pancake is ready to be flipped.

That’s it.  That’s the secret to perfectly cooked pancakes.

Simple, right?

Good.

Ready for the recipe?

Rock on.

Best pancakes ever! I'm so glad I gave them another go.

Sweet Potato Pie Pancakes (Gluten-free):

1/2 medium sweet potato, peeled and mashed (100 grams or so, pre-cooked weight)

1/2 tsp baking powder

1/8 tsp cloves

dash nutmeg

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

1 T brown rice flour (may sub in cornstarch)

1/2 cup egg whites

1 tsp coconut oil

Puree all ingredients in your blender (I used my immersion blender).  Preheat your skillet to medium-low heat.  When it’s ready, oil your pan.

Pour 1/3 cup batter onto your skillet.  When the bubble in the middle pops, flip the pancake.  Repeat.  Should make three medium-large pancakes.

Smear glaze all over pancakes, and smother in bananas.  Or pears.  Or apples.  Or berries.  It’s all good.

Almond-Butter Honey Glaze:

2 tbs almond butter

2 tbs almond milk (or non-dairy milk of your choosing)

1/2 tbs honey (to taste)

Place in microwave safe bowl (I used a ramekin) and nuke for 10 seconds.  Stir like mad, until fluffy and creamy.  Pour onto pancakes, take a bite, and if you die right then, you will die happy.

Healthful and delicious? Bring. It.

One small warning: these were moist and fluffy and amazing, but I accidentally added too much egg white to the mix.

Hey, I have a heavy hand.  I can’t help it.  It’s a genetic deformity.

Start with 2/5 of a cup of egg whites for a denser, more-pancake-esque consistency, though 1/2 cup should be fine.  Mine turned out a bit crepe-y (NOT crappy, c’mon, guys), but then again, I added about a tablespoon or two too much.

Oh, and a shout-out to the kid brother, who gently reminded me that pancakes do need a bit of fat for texture and taste.  He’s 100% right.  I’m glad I added it.

Thanks for reading!  I hope you enjoy this recipe!

❤ Kaz

One of my favorite food philosophies is this: “Eat dessert first.”  Evidently this quote is attributed to a gent named Ernestine Ulmer, and I think I’ll have to agree with him wholeheartedly.

In learning how to IE (intuitively eat), I’ve had to shed the old “save the best for last” mentality and embrace my inner hunger beast.  I used to force myself to clean my plate, and as incentive, I’d save the best part for last.  I’d pick at my vegetables then dive head first into my peanut butter, or eat around the custard filling in my pie, then finally inhale it.

Mmm, custard.

I love custard.  You know what’s better than custard, though?  Custard for breakfast.

Life is uncertain.  Eat dessert first.

You can’t get any more “first” than breakfast.

So, I ate custard for breakfast.

But, not just any custard.  Chocolate peanut butter custard.  With bananas.  Mmm.  Drooling yet?

You want to know the hardest part about being a food blogger?  Waiting until you’ve snapped enough pictures before diving head first into a bowl of awesome.

And this bowl, my friends, was THE awesome.

Sorry, the lighting is a bit off here. Still. PUDDING.

Plus, it was super easy to make.  It took me all of five minutes.

You know how some people will healthify (yes, I’m making up words here) something, then slap the word “breakfast” on it to justify it tasting like rubbish?  For example, “Breakfast Cookies.”  They take all the yum out of it, reduce the flavor by 1000% percent, then say, “It’s okay.  They’re breakfast cookies.”

This, my friends, is NOT breakfast pudding*.

It’s pudding.  Plain and simple.  I’d eat it for dessert, rub my belly, and smile.  It’s THAT good.

I could bathe in this.

The only sneaky thing I did is up the nutritional profile, but that’s not a bad thing.  That only changed my phaser from “stunning” to “killer”.

Ready for this?

Of course you are.

Any time is a good time for pudding.  Especially breakfast.

In a small saucepan, add 2 tablespoons of honey, 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder, 1.5 tablespoons of cornstarch, and 3/4 a cup of almond milk.  If you don’t have almond milk, you can use water, though I can’t guarantee it’ll taste as great.  Or, use real milk.  Use whatever you wish.  This is just what I had on hand.

Over low heat, stir until the cocoa is integrated into the liquid, and the mix is a homogeneous chocolate color.  Yes, chocolate color.  Chocolate has a color, and “brown” does not do it justice.  So, it’s chocolate colored.

Bananas only make things better.

Don’t come running to me, though, when you have wax stuck in your teeth from gnawing on a “burnt sepia” crayon, though.  That’s not my fault.  “Burnt sepia” is NOT chocolate colored.

Bring your heat up to medium, and stir.  Stir constantly.  Stir until your arm wants to fall off, and be sure to scrape the bottom of the pan regularly.  You don’t want  your pudding to lump.  Lumps in your pudding are never a good thing.

Lump is an icky word.  You want to know what’s worse?  Clot.  Ew.  Cornstarch clots.  Ugh.  Did I make you lose your appetite?  Please don’t.  This pudding will bring it back, I swear it.

Still.  Stir constantly or you’ll get cornstarch…clots. (I shuddered.  Sorry.  Forgive me.)

Peanut butter just makes it better, though.

There, does that help?

Back to the pudding.  Stir until the pudding is thick and when you run your spoon along the bottom, you can see the bottom of the pan.  Your spoon will also leave drag-marks in the pudding, and if you picked it up and plopped (another gross word!  sheesh, Kaz, what’s up with you today?) some pudding back into the pan, it’d hold its shape for a few seconds.

Once your pudding is thick and creamy, slowly slowly slowly add in your 1/4 cup egg whites.  You want to stir like you’ve never stirred before.  If not, your egg whites will curdle. (That makes four today?  Clot, curdle, lump, plop.)  If you do it right, though, your egg whites will thicken up the pudding amazingly and you’ll kick yourself for having not thought of it yourself.

Add your 1/2 tsp vanilla at this point, stir, and remove it from the heat.  See, told you.  Easy.  Look at your clock.  Took you less than five minutes, didn’t it?  I told you.

Pour into your bowl, and if you want it to cool, stick it in the freezer while you slice up a whole banana.  Layer your pudding with your banana, and add a generous dollop of peanut butter.

Money shot!

And, if that isn’t enough, add some crunchy peanut buttery cereal.  Yes.

I bought some Peanut Butter Pandas exactly for that reason.  I paid under three bucks for a box of them at the grocery store, and they’re amazing for those sweet/savory peanut buttery cravings.  Plus, if you eat them one at a time, you can enjoy them longer.  I particularly enjoy them because they’re organic, and before you sniff at me and call me a snob, I’m not.  But, I rather dislike Monsanto (that’s a post in and of itself), so buying organic corn is my way of stickin’ it to the man.

Hey, we all have our quirks.  That’s mine.

And peanut butter.  Mmm, peanut butter.

You know how some people add Nilla wafers to add crunch and interest to their pudding?  That’s what the Peanut Butter Panda Puffs (yay for alliteration!) provide for this.  And besides, this is breakfast.  What’s breakfast without breakfast cereal?

Exactly.

Wow. Just...wow.

Ready for a recap?  Of course you are.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Pudding

2 tbs honey

2 tbs cocoa powder

1.5 tbs cornstarch

3/4 cup almond milk

1/4 cup egg whites

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

Toppings: one ripe, whole banana; 1-2 tbs peanut butter; 1/4 cup peanut butter cereal

Add first four ingredients into your sauce pan and stir over low heat.  Increase heat to medium, keep stirring until thick.  Slowly add in egg white, stir like mad to avoid lumping.  When thick, add 1/2 tsp vanilla extract and remove from heat.

Add toppings as you wish, and dive in head first.

Enjoy!

So rich and creamy, I almost couldn't finish it all!

Thanks for reading!  I have an amazing guest recipe coming up for lunch, courtesy of my wonderful genius sister.

That is, if I don’t totally botch it up.

Knowing me, I will.  Gotta keep on truckin’.

❤ Kaz

*Yes, I know I called it custard before.  I’m loopy like that.